Friday, November 2, 2012

Breaking up is hard to do

I recently learned why I was so bad with breaking up! I didn't really get into the dating game until I was 22 a lot of my friends dated way sooner and some were even married by the time I ever "really kissed" anyone. The problem is, when you are a teenager and go through your bad boyfriend stage, your parents are there to help guide you through. I on the other hand had roommates that didn't know how to tell you that the guy you were dating was a complete . . . dead end!

See, my problem lies in that I don't have the ability to see people for who they really are, I see them for who I want them to be. I use to think that I saw them for who they had the potential to become, but realized that that potential was completely based on what I wanted for their life, therefore I see people for what I want them to become.

The guy who got sent home from his mission for making out with a girl in his area--yeah I thought I could get him to be faithful to me (even though he couldn't be faithful to God.) The med student that went to Yale, but had NO personality. The guy that was really cool but didn't want to spend a lot of time together. The guy who could cook--oh could he cook! But he also had a little problem with the truth, like the fact that he told me he was friends with Julia Roberts, Sandra Bullock, Steve Young and he hosted a charity auction with Pamela Anderson! But he could cook!

This latter guy is actually the only guy I broke up with. I was living in Provo, UT and we dated for a few weeks and then I went to AZ to take care of my mom while she was recovering from a knee replacement. We were apart for six weeks, which was much longer than we ever dated. While I was in AZ I realized that we were two different people that wanted different things. Yet when I went back to UT I had the hardest time telling him that it wouldn't work out! I actually kept talking to him on the phone for years!

Recently I had been watching Pscyh on Netflix while I was canning, working out, sewing etc... I realized that the last episode was coming up and I was upset. I didn't watch the last episode thinking that when I finally did, the end would be easier to take. I waited weeks before I allowed myself to watch the last episode. I figured that I had moved on and was ready. A couple of days ago I watched it. Instead of being able to move on, I realized why I love the show. Nothing would ever take its place. The sadness still came.

Luckily for me, they put season 6 on there yesterday. That gives me 16 more episodes until I finally have to break up. Oh happy day!

Today I am thankful for clarity/wisdom that comes with age. And Netflix--I do love Netflix.

1 comment:

  1. Great analysis of relationships--we are sooooo much alike! Problem for me is that I married two of those guys. That. Really. Sucks. Also, seems I should check out Psyche--never heard of it.

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